•Our father saw grandchild as money spinner –Daughter •I did my best –Father
From Okwe Obi, Abuja
For Ruth Chabani, a 28-year-old mentally unstable indigene of Bassa Local Government Area of Kogi State, who recently gave birthday to a boy, it is another season of agony. Her child died after two weeks and two days.
Chabani, a graduate of Public Administration from Kogi State Polytechnic, Idah, was impregnated by a yet-to-be identified man and delivered through caesarean section (CS), at the Gwarinpa-Life Camp General Hospital, Abuja.
When our correspondent visited the family home, a suburb with rough roads in Gwagwalada Area Council, her father, Williams, in a solemn mood, gave a harrowing tale of raising a grandchild and at the same time minding a grownup daughter who was mentally sick.
The retired police officer said his grandchild had severe diarrhea, which led to incessant stooling and eventual death.
The father of six said his daughter, who was a first-time mother, prevented everyone from assisting to care for the child. And in order not to aggravate her mental illness, she had her way to do whatever she liked.
The 67-year-old man also said he acted based on physical symptoms, not knowing that there were other underlying conditions that triggered the illness.
“The baby was purging. I only bought drugs for diarrhea to stop the purging but my daughter Ruth broke the bottle of medicine.
“Ruth did not allow any of us to give the child drugs or even to bathe the baby. It was only once that she allowed one of our neighbours to bathe the baby.
“Aside from that, she was always adamant. She never allowed us to examine the baby. We only bought drugs to stop the purging because that was the illness we could see,” he said, looking helpless.
The widower explained that the only time he had free access to the child was when his daughter would have been sleeping after taking her sedative pills to tame her reactions, and the baby was crying.
He said: “Even if the baby is crying she will not know. We will sneak in, take and feed the baby. And if she woke up and noticed that we tampered with her baby or the things in her room, she would start quarrelling.
“So, we continued to manage the situation until he died exactly two weeks and two days after. We buried the baby at ECWA cemetery at Nkwadudu, here in Gwagwalada.
“As a grandfather, I have accepted my fate. There is nothing I could do. God gives and He takes. Glory be to God. I believe my daughter will be okay. We did not give the baby a name because he was still small.
“Funny enough, up till now no man has come out to say he impregnated her. Since the incident, she does not go out as before. She is always within. I give her money to buy anything she wanted.”
In the midst of the struggle for the child’s survival, he said he made frantic efforts in search of a permanent cure for his daughter. According to him, the industrial action embarked by medical doctors stymied his moves.
“When we were at that Maitama/Life Camp Hospital, the doctors directed us to a specialist hospital at Gwagwalada.
“When we went there, we were told that doctors were on strike. They said we should come back on August 28.
“They said they could not admit her because doctors were on strike. Actually, the medicine was working and by then the child was alive. It was not easy for us. When she takes the drugs, she sleeps off,” he lamented.
But his daughter, Grace, a teacher, accused her father of contributing to the child’s death by rejecting advice from nurses who told him to take the boy to a motherless babies’ home, given the mental condition of his daughter.
The mother of one said she had no reservations catering for the child, but the erratic behaviour of her younger sister was scary. She claimed that her sister was giving the baby cold water and staple, which was not healthy for a newborn.
According to her, her father brought the child home to do business. She claimed that her father wanted all the money that should be paid at the motherless babies’ home to be paid to him.
She said: “The nurses suggested that the child should be taken to the motherless babies’ home, since Ruth was mentally unstable.
“For me, looking after a baby was not my problem but Ruth is not okay. She fights me all the time and does not allow me touch the baby.
“How was I expected to help? Even when I was with her at the hospital, she treated me badly. She chased me away. We were all in support that the baby should stay at the motherless babies’ home for a period of time.
“At least, from time to time, we would be visiting the baby and contribute our own quota to the welfare of our child.
“Our neighbours discouraged my father from taking the child to the motherless babies’ home. They said it was not going to be easy for him to collect the baby after some years. I heard all they said.
“The day the doctors said they were going to refer us to Gwagwalada Specialist Hospital for my sister, it was that same day they went on strike. We had to manage the situation.
“I noticed that, instead for Ruth to be giving the baby warm water, she was given the child cold water. I complained to the nurses that her action was dangerous.
“The nurses said Ruth does not listen to anybody; they said that they tried to guide her but to no avail. At home, she would put on the fan and face the baby. I told her that the baby was too young for such exposure.
“It took intense persuasion for her to allow me touch the baby. My sister was not following the drug prescription. Sometimes, she would take overdose and sleep off.
“If you try to boil water for her to bathe and she noticed that the water was for her baby, she would throw away the water and boil a fresh one.
“The very day Ruth gave birth, people told my father not to bring the child home but to take the boy to the motherless babies’ home; he refused.
“He brought the child home to do business. He believed that the money that should be paid at the motherless babies’ home should be paid to him. Even some of our neighbours are not happy with my father.”
