Nigerians woke up to the story of an attempted suicide by a beautiful woman (going by her pictures that I have seen) the media described as “a Lagos socialite”, some days back.
The comment that was subsequently attributed to her fingered her failed marriage as the chief cause of her mental breakdown.
A marriage the media said was to “another Lagos socialite”.
It is also claimed that the marriage did not last more than two months.
When anybody is described as “a socialite”, I swallow my saliva!
Being a socialite actually means that one’s life is more out there than decency permits.
Although we are in an era where so many economic ventures that put food on people’s table come from social engagements, mental health experts have consistently pointed at the unwholesome effect of its excessiveness.
What is not in doubt is that the life of a socialite is more about maintaining an image.
Further details of their marriage that ‘scattered’ publicly was the claim that “the couple engaged in altercations and body-shaming themselves.”
It doesn’t matter who started what, once we realise that we always have a choice to not show up in any drama that we are invited to.
May this be a learning curve for women who live for societal validation!
It’s not about being popular and “packing crowd” …how many in your space can you really call ‘a friend’?
A lot can trigger mental breakdown. But a MOTHER who could consider ‘ending it all’ over a man needs the reassessment of her priorities.
It just does not seem like her children are on top of that list!
Dear women,
If you must bother with marriage at a certain stage of your life, the other party had better be worth it, in every sense of the word.
Otherwise, find other fulfilling ways to live your life. And be happy.
I don’t know when it will dawn on women that a single life is as blessed as a (happily) married life.
With children in the picture, you have a lot to thank God for, still.
Someone who could quit a marriage in just two months and can afford to open their mouth against you publicly is not worth losing yourself over.
I also know that when you are rich in self-love, there is no drama over who leaves or stays.
The average socialite is surrounded by more fake than real friends.
So, it’s important to go the extra mile in cultivating an inner circle that is real; people you can cry on their shoulder and they will genuinely care. And not scheme on selling you out to bloggers.
It’s not likely that someone who saw suicide as the way out enabled a strong support system in her space.
That’s the mistake of a lot of women!
Once they marry the wrong person, their closeness with loved ones becomes the first casualty of the mistake of a union.
Two habits are especially important in life:
Cry to God more than you cry to anybody or over anybody.
Learn to lick your wound silently.
We are humans and we won’t stop touching the dust. But, it’s an act of courage to not call a pity party.
What was the need for the public mudslinging when the marriage packed up?
Frankly, it has cast a huge question mark on the character of both parties.
Reports claimed that her lamentation as she was being led away from where she tried committing suicide was “my handsome husband has left me, after I spent hundred million naira to marry him.”
Well, such experiences are assured, when looks come before character for you.
Not every fantasy is worth pursuing with your hard-earned money.
Sometimes, close your eyes to the ephemerals and use your resources to uplift humanity instead.
Life knows how to ‘settle’ you.
